Wednesday, December 21, 2005

ABC News Poll

ABC news poll says 52% of New Yorkers support the Transit Union strike. Would you get this impression from watching the local news?

Damon Now a Yankee

Damon has gone to the Yankees for 52 million. Can fans strike against a moronic front office?

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Exclimation Points Threaten Strike

I was all pro the strike and labor generally, but labor difficulties are now hitting close to home. The exclamation points have threaten to walk out of negotiations citing over use during MTA strike coverage. They've tried to make the point that they're only holding out for benefits they currently have and not trying to extend privileges such as healthcare. Moreover, they whine about future exclamation points, as those currently in service will get their benefits grand fathered in. However, we know their kind to be ungrateful for the largess extended to them here at bluefishcanoe (they also have a reputation for being a bit on the lazy side). The semicolons accepted a benefits evisceration, so why can't the exclamation points? From now on their arguments will be buried on the later portions of this page.

!!Transit Strike Update!!

How are Union workers getting to the picket lines? !!!!!

12:00 Strike Central

It's 12:00, Monday. Roger Toussaint is about to come on NY 1. It's still unclear if we're having a strike or not. NY1 is reporting a strike, but both the MTA bosses and the Union have yet to confirm this report. Unclear where NY1 is getting this information, but nonetheless NY1 is reporting it. Among other bizzare points the MTA bosses won't give in on is that the MTA refuses to recognize Martin Luther King Day. Yet NY1 has interviewed a steady stream of New Yorkers against the strike.

Monday, December 19, 2005

Viva Toussaint!

Mr. Toussaint, leader of the transit union, seems to be ready to take the entire workforce of the New York ,MTA on strike at midnight tonight. Drink up fellas because if get out of that bar after 12 you're walking!

Mayor Bloomberg, speaking on behalf of the city, continues to call the transit workers selfish for not giving into city demands that future employees pay co-pays with their health insurance. However, changes to the health system will only affect future workers, so claims that the current workforce is acting out of self-interest are totally lame.

Mr. Toussaint can be arrested for organizing the strike because the MTA strike violates the Talyor Act. His jail will undoubtedly minimal and will inspire strikers and catapult Toussaint into strike infamy.

Here at bluefishcanoe we’re hunkered down with bottled water and canned food—enough for 20 years of transit strike. (The delivery guys will still be working right? Because the food is stored at the Chinese takeout.) Anyway I’m ready. Strike away!

Saturday, December 17, 2005

!!Transit Strike ’05!!

I’m reporting live from the epi-center of the great transit strike of 2005 in New York City! The Metropolitan Transit Authority (MTA), which manages New York City transit, insists that new union workers accept less health benefits and get their pensions later than current employees. The MTA cites “hard times” as a justification for the cuts, despite the fact that the members of Local 100 of the Transport Workers Union do possibly the most important job in the city, while they breath in high quantities of asbestos and mystery substances typically and vaguely termed “particulate matter”. Union workers are quick to point out that the MTA has a one million dollar surplus, and that times are far from hard. However, for reasons that remain unclear, the MTA bosses are allowed to operate with more autonomy than most third world nations. Evidence of the MTA's indepence from oversight and reason could be seen in Mayor Bloomberg’s sheepish suggestion that the Union give in soon, presumably because the MTA is allowed authority over not just the Union contract, but also the English language definition of “hard times” (with no apologies to those at Oxford’s English Dictionary).

I won’t go through the intricacies of the dispute, but I will say one sticking point is that the MTA wants workers to stay on the job until they are 62 before getting pensions, not 55, the current age where pensions are awarded. The public seems to support the MTA on this issue, and thus consenting to old people driving subways. Vision, hearing, and reaction time all plummet with old age, so why we would want old people driving subway cars remains unclear.

So far, a few formerly private buss lines in Queens have been the first to strike, thus affecting only a tiny percentage of New Yorkers.

Media coverage of Transit Strike ’05 has been more biased in favor of the MTA bosses than any other bias this blogger has ever observed, especially in tabloid papers such as the New York Post and New York One, which is essentially a TV version of Post stories plus useful temperature updates. This media bias reflects New Yorker’s total lack of sympathy or understanding for transit workers. Some have suggested this apathy towards transit workers stems from transit workers general rudeness, some suggests it’s because the transit workers are largely African American; however indifference to the health care concerns of transit workers may just come from the inconveniences that will result from a transit strike. Either way New Yorkers have once again proven to be far from their liberal stereotype when it comes to problems in their own city.

The Editorial Board here at Blue Fish Canoe whole heatedly supports the transit strike, and would like to be the first to dub cab drivers that pick up more passengers after an initial passenger, the heroes of transit strike ’05. A representative from the cab workers Union heroically replies to this attribution by saying all New Yorkers are the real heroes.

Furthermore, “I Survived Transit Strike ‘05” tee shirts, hats and baby-tees are now on sale here. In your face casualties!

Thursday, December 15, 2005

A very girlie blog

If you are a dude, when you were a kid did you ever go into a friend’s older sister’s room? I grew up with one brother and few female friends, so accidental forays into female-dom occurred rarely; however I do remember one. A friend of mine and I were playing our usual game of lead paint eating or hammer fighting, and I recall hiding from further toxic exposure or bludgeoning behind a door at the end of the friend’s hall. The door was his sister’s and was kept closed. The sister was gone, and the room was foreign and implicitly forbidden. It smelled sweet and things that should have been drab colors like staplers and slippers were bright pink. I recall a pencil with a pink afro instead of an eraser. Blinded by sharp colors which had never before grazed my retina, and buzzed from lead related cerebral hemorrhaging (and/or hammer related hemorrhages), I fled the scene.

But now many years later (ok two years later), I had a blog induced flash back of the whole ordeal when I stumbled on Check it out and you too may relive gender role defining moments in your life. And then e-mail about how did this girl got the tracers of hearts to follow the mouse pointer?

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

This website allows you to sign a petition about keeping Manny in Boston. Clearly, I have nothing better to do.

I got this from the Bill Simmons site.

Monday, December 12, 2005

New-Old Sox

Even more bizarre than the rumor that Nomar may come back to the Sox is talk of Clemens coming back. Of course the Red Sox are one of the few teams that could pay their mammoth salaries--thus our not-so-subtle trick for keeping Manny in town may work on the former Sox...

But naturally my bias is against losing anyone from the second half of the 04 season, and taking on Clemens or Nomar would only push the fall 04 crew further away. Also I consider myself totally immune to Manny's disinclination towards Boston. Maybe I don't take it personally when Manny expresses dissatisfaction with Beantown because I'm from Worcester. Or maybe it's because he's a World Series MVP and our best hitter since Yaz. In either case Manny may take a big, old dump in front of Quincy Market, and I would simple walk around the excrement on my way to the Cheers replica bar or whatever horribleness they have on Faneuil Hall.

Sunday, December 11, 2005


Does anyone know how Google works? I’ve long felt that the secret and mysterious algorithm, which governs access cyber-knowledge is beyond my comprehension, but also I trusted its judgment. I hear it has something to do with the number of links to your site, not number of hits—hence the blogger etiquette of linking to sites that have linked to yours in hopes of cross-pollination. But that doesn’t explain which search topics will bring web surfers to your site. A quick examination of referrals to bluefishcanoe and a google experiment reveals that searching under blue fish canoe brings one nowhere near the site. Searching under Oil Can Boyd gets one no closer. However searching under Transvestite Academy puts you right on the door step of bluefishcanoe.

I guess I should put out a disclaimer: for all those looking for a/the Transvestite Academy, I have little to no information on such an institution. I support your lifestyle choice and quest for higher learning, but sadly I remain largely ignorant of reliable information on the subject. I do mention a ‘Transvestite Academy Awards Show’ in the 11/7 entry (who among us has not?), but I write sparsely on the subject after that. However, the news is not all bad. Fortunately the Internet abounds with resources on your pursuit. Just go back to google search and check out another link.

Saturday, December 10, 2005

The Great One

I would have linked up to this site earlier, but to be honesty I felt unworthy. Now that it’s clear I’m going to try and write about Boston sports among other things, I feel I must do this out of respect. Today I unveil my link to the man who got his start as a blogger (not counting the Herald) and went on to redefine sports media. A man who once wrote about considering stealing an ornamented cup from a church to use a trophy in this video game football league. The popularizer, though not inventor, of the ‘Ewing Theory.’ The Alexander the Great of Internet sports writing. Holy Cross (in Worcester) class of 1992 graduate -- Bill Simmons.... Well not him of course, just a link to his website.

Friday, December 09, 2005

A Third Third Baseman--updated

I've been out of the internet and blogging scene for about a week now due to finals, and other commitments, but I recently checked in on Worcester, MA's Tellegram and Gazette , and in five minutes, I've caught up with the Red Sox. The good, old T&G spared me of the endless editorializing of the Boston Globe, as well Dan Shaughnessy's trademark ramble at the opening of his columns, and his general disdain for Boston sports. Note: the T&G online is only free for those with subscriptions, but we have people working to get it distributed freely on the net (thanks HW).

The Red Sox just traded their shortstop, Egar Renteria, for the Braves third baseman and young prospect, Andy Marte. We can add Marte to the list of thirdbaseman which includes Kevin Youkilis, Bill Mueller, and Mike Lowell. To deal with this glut of 3B-man, we may rename 1B and 2B, 3Ba, and 3Bb. However, the second base situation is not unlike that at third. We had plenty of second baseman (Alex Cora, prospect Dustin Pedroia, Tony Graffanino) yet we traded our best backup catcher and Wakefield specialist, Doug Mirabelli, to the Padres for another 2B-man in Mark Loretta.

Thus the net transaction of recent months is basically a gain of Josh Becket and Marte, and a loss of Renteria, Mirabelli and Hanley Ramirez--all and all not too terrible. Although it’s possible H. Ramirez will eventually wear a foreign uniform of a consistent contender like the dreaded pin strip, as the Marlins won't hold onto him if he proves himself. The free agent situation is totally up in the air, but judging by our habit of acquiring third basemen, Bill Mueller may be moving. Also we have to find someone else who can catch a knuckle ball.

There's been some worrying talk of bringing back Nomar. I'm not sure if he's the kind of veteran that can pull together a young team of strangers. I might regard his reacquisition as not unlike a drunken hookup with an ex girlfriend. Familiar, certainly fun, but not altogether right in its own way. (No need to question how this analogy reflects on me.) We also lost guys like Harvey Garcia and gained guys like Guillermo Motto. I won't even pretend to have a clue what that means. Do some of these trades feel more like managment is trying to prove they can make moves without Theo, rather than a real plan for the future of the organization?

Nothing is new with Oil Can Boyd on either the film, book, or trial scene; though I continue to scour the internet for updates.

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Oil Can Update

In a recent ESPN interview Oil Can Boyd unvieled plans for his new book and movie. An except from the interview is reproduced below:

I'm writing a book,'' said the Can. "But it's going to be hard because every day, a new book starts. We're even talking about movie rights: The 'Oil Can' Boyd Story. The newspapers here said Denzel [Washington] or Jamie Foxx might be best to play me, but I'll probably have to play me because as we know, there's only one 'Oil Can' Boyd.''

The interview again raises the question, is the Oil Can a master of his art, or a slave to his creations. His deft command of both the literary and film forms is self-evident (or at least will be), but has the Can's mystique surpassed all that can be captured by today's popular black actors leaving the only person capable of portraying Oil Can to be Oil Can himself? How will Oil Can manage the demands of writing a novel, adapting that novel to film, and staring in the film on top of a semi-pro baseball career (as well as impending criminal prosecution: see last Can update)? Shakespeare was busy, but did he have to pitch once every 5 to 7 days of the summer for the Brockton, Rox? One thing we do know is that if any man can pull this off, the Can can.

Viva la Bridge Runner

Coming over the Manhattan bridge yesterday evening, in the distance, I saw what appeared to be a topless person running at me. As the figure approach, I realized it was a woman, with a shaved head, and her clothing draped over her arm. When she got close I saw she was smiling. As she passed me my head turned (these things work on a molecular level—and out of my control (1)). I asked if she was alright because remaining silent seemed rude somehow. She yelled over her shoulder that she was great, and it was a photo shoot. Some little hip dude with a camera was crouched in front of me. Had she not mentioned it, I would have walked clear into him.

Needless to say the bridge runner made my afternoon. Rock on bridge runner! I raise a glass and light a J to your photo shoot.

1. Jerry Seinfeld.