Thursday, June 29, 2006
Note: Jerry Remy went to the Mets booth to be interviewed by the Mets announcers and Remy started commenting on the Mets v. Sox game. Remy is an announcer among announcers.
Monday, June 26, 2006
I believe this suit-less-ness could be no clearer indication that the Corporate Bastard is not just trying to homogenize us in look and thought but also in body shape. If you’re not 6 feet tall then you have to try and get married in jeans resulting in a jilting at the alter for your slovenliness so your lady can go procreate with someone who can produce kids that fit into mass produced clothing. Friends suggested that it was probably a supply and demand thing with the actual cause having to do with the prevalence of 6 foot men with money and the effect being the big suits, until I relayed this exchange: I go into Barney’s and ask the suit guy if he has any 36-short sized suits. He asked what I’d like to spend. I say $400 (a little bit of an overestimation). He tells me they have nothing in the store at that price. They have literally 2 floors of suits. I grab the first price tag I see and it reads: SALE $348. I bring this to the suit guy’s attention and he says, “well, I meant, we have nothing in your price range in your size”. I ask why not, and he says, “we simply don’t carry clothing that small, maybe you could go to the gym and bulk up a little.” Judging by the tenor of his voice, I estimate he was 20 percent joking and 80 percent giving sincere advice. That translates to 80 percent of his head so lost in exploring the cavernous folds of his own arse that it seems reasonable to him to suggest that I might alter my entire body shape to buy his clothing.
In the end I found a shop near where I work. It’s the last store going south on Broadway far past where most people look. Every shopper there other than myself was a Latino man over the age of 70. And I bought a funky, pimpin’, cigar smoking, salsa drumming, badass suit. Price = not $400.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
I am now listening to the new Bruce Springsteen folk album called “We Shall Overcome: The Seeger Sessions” despite the overwhelming sense that I’m becoming less cool by the second. The album is actually very good as is the flip side DVD. The thing about iconic musicians who become characters in their own story and then infuse that character into their music—you know the Springteens, the Johnny Cashes, the Shane Macgowans—is that they’re all about authenticity… or at least the convincing appearance of it.
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Sunday, June 18, 2006
Friday, June 16, 2006
A gay male couple, P&D, moved to a farmhouse near my uncle in
I am pleased to report this experimentation in modern, tolerant living in rural
Thursday, June 15, 2006
A friend of mine, JH, is Israeli and his brother is gay. The brother, also a JH, is working on a gay Israeli porn called Suspicious Package. My friend will be making the sequel, a straight porn based on the Abu Ghraib scandal called Dishonorable Discharge.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
I just got back from visiting my cousin and uncle in
My cousin and her boyfriend are so cool I tend to forget the 12 year age difference between them and myself. However, the age gap did appear at odd times. Stevie Ray Vaughn came on the radio and the boyfriend didn’t know he was died, the kids didn’t know the rules to the board game, Clue, and while the boyfriend and I were discussing the merits of moderate drinking, the boyfriend announced that two drinks were the ideal quantify--he thought. I asked for clarification: did he mean in the morning or evening? He meant two drinks per 24 hr period! For no particular reason, I was livening up a glass of OJ with tequila at the time. I poured a little extra booze to make it up to the gods of booze.
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
This picture showed a giant close up of a newborn’s wrinkled head (or possibly a very, very old person). The writing on the back of this picture says:
Bluefish Canoe, 2 days old 6/7/1978
So if I was 2 days old on June 7th, that would make my birthday June 5th, right? My parents hated this idea feeling in someway losing track of a child’s birthday might represent parental flakiness they had failed to cover-up. I loved it. Anything, that can bring any mystery into an otherwise totally ordinary existence, I welcome wholeheartedly.
After it all settled in a bit, my mother thanked the All Mighty that I wasn’t born on June 6. Thus she avoided having a child on 6-6-78, who on 6-6-06 would obviously proclaim his true identity as Satan. Again, I disagree. If and when Satan does decide to return to earth—if he is not already here—wouldn’t being the woman who brought him into the world be a pretty sweet gig compared to the rest of us dancing away on fire and brimstone? I know if I turn out to be Satan, I’ll go easier on dear old mom than I will on the rest of you swine. My mom admitted she was wrong, agreed with my reasoning, and went silent; I believe she began to mentally compose a list of enemies (mainly other Worcester Public school teachers) that she might use her new authority against as mother of the Dark One. My father’s cat rushed out of the room sensing she might be among the first to be smote.
Monday, June 05, 2006
I followed the good example of CC&P and went out to the Ninja Restaurant in Tribeca last night. (It was the 28th anniversary of my hatching.) At the Ninja Restaurant there are no waiters or bus boys. Instead, ninjas bring out your food and clear your table. Ninja’s also surprise you when you’re going through the
Friday, June 02, 2006
Thursday, June 01, 2006
So many things have happened over the last week. Firstly, I tore down my loft bed using a hammer, saw, and a screwdriver on the same day. Then I had a few beers. Then I began this blog.
Beyond that I went to a wedding in wine country,
Several years in