The Controversial Closer

Many baseball fans who consider themselves among the Billy Bean, Bill James crew--the thinking fans have pointed to the over emphasis on the closer in today's game. To large extent they are right of course. They note that runs scored in any middle inning are equal to runs scored in the 8th and 9th, and therefore there is no reason to save one of your best pitchers for the end of the game. I'm not so sure that's entirely true. Due to the large luck component in baseball many games will be blow outs for one team or another. No matter who you have pitching your going to lose by 4 to 5 runs due to bad luck alone and there is no point in having your best guys in during a bad luck game. From the pitcher's point of view, the luck component is even larger because it encompasses how his fielders preform and who the team hits. However, as a manager by the 8th and 9th you have a pretty good idea if you're having a bad luck game or not. Saving a good pitcher for close games may allow you to keep from wearing him down in un-winable games.

T&G

I've been campaigning for a while to get all my Sox fan friends to switch to Worcester's T&G over the Boston Globe as their source for Sox news. If any more evidence is needed I submit this article. It's insightful, fact filled, and there's even a public health metaphor.

Lickers

I feel as though if the envelope were invented today we wouldn't lick it to seal it shut. I enjoy the taste of envelope glue and am thankful that the envelope came of age at a time when licking things was perfectly normal. In those days people were going around licking everything: light posts, door knobs, the handles on urinals. It was the non-lickers who were the odd ones. Yep, if you didn't lend a tongue in licking the city clean you were considered a hygiene risk.

Sports Fact

Lou Piniella and Dave Magadan are cousins. They are Spanish (i.e. from Spain) Americans.

Bumper Stickers

I’ve recently relocated from the Northeast to the mid Atlantic and I notice bumpers stickers are far more popular here. I think most of them are lame, but I recently heard about a good one. It reads: Prolife? Prochoice? Pro Football.

Rendering

I recently found out about rendering, the process whereby livestock parts leftover from the slaughterhouse and dead pets are made into cosmetics. Weird stuff.

The Departed

I just saw The Departed and it was as good as people say. It has particular resonance for me having known a guy growing up who was exactly like Matt Damon's character. Generally, I don't like movies with more than three well known male actors because they don't look actually like actors but just a bunch of dudes hanging out. That's fine for an Oceans 11 type movie where that's the point, but not for real movie. The Departed doesn't have this problem.

On the other hand, I don't like Jack Nicholson. I just don't think he's a good actor anymore.

Johnny Cash's birthday

It's Johnny Cash day

Scuba Diving Cat

Dude, check this out. It's a cat that scuba dives.

The Faith Dog

Ohh, man. When I saw this at the gym I ran, not walked to blog about it.

Robert Reich's controversial opposition to slavery

I know, I know, worrying about international trade is totally 90s, but so is Robert Reich, and for that matter so is this blogger. Thus I will say this: Reich suggested on his blog that 1) slavery should be abolished, and 2) an international minimum wage should attempt to be established and that minimum wage should be set around 1/2 a countries median income. Conservatives are so fanatical about the free market that they jumped on all over part 2) bypassing part 1) entirely. Can't we discuss part 1) before advancing to part 2)? Isn't that at the very core of why one might lay out a proposition in two parts. If so, do conservative really believe that we should be trading with countries that allow slavery? What a bunch of a-holes.

It should also be noted that Robert Reich blogs on blogger. It's really time to move on.

Pre Season Gossip

If Roger Clemens claims to be retired until July and then pops up on a team in playoff contention does that allow him to avoid steroid testing? If so, he'll totally get away with it and that's totally lame, unless Clemens resurfaces with the Red Sox--in which case it's shrewed.

Did you hear Jeter and A-Rod hate each other? I mean they won't admit to a life long brothership, therefore they hate each other. As I've always said: no pledge of life long brothership by Jeter and A-Rod = hate each other.

This Blog Is Your Blog

In the afore-blog regarding my recent creation of a Bruce mix, I should note I include Bruce's versions of the Woody Guthrie classic "this land is your land." The first interesting thing about this song is that according to Guthrie historians, WG made this song as an answer to Irvin Berlin's "God Bless America" which Guthrie found to be elitist and annoying, especially Kate Smith's version. This Kate Smith version is of course the version they play at baseball games post 9/11 along with "Take Me Out to the Ball Game". If you are tired of "God Bless America" in the seventh, then you are in good company, or at least you would be if Guthrie was still alive. As of now you just hate America.

The other interesting thing about the song and my mix is that there are multiple versions of "This Land Is Your Land". One is the cleaned up version sung by grade schoolers, while the others include lyrics deemed too commie for Flag day celebrants. Bruce did a version of the school kid one, and then discovered the alternative lyrics version, and of course immediately went to work on the alternative version. Unfortunately, Bruce tried to mix in Guthrie in on the track along with other living celebs. He botched the mixing terribly. Nonetheless and more for historical reasons both versions are included on my Bruce mix.

Springsteen

I recently sent my brother some Bruce Springsteen songs via MP3. I am a life long Springsteen fan and a friend of mine listened to so much Springsteen in High School, I've actually committed his entire catalogue to memory. In fact, I don't even play his music anymore. When I want to hear it I just play it in my head. I believe if aliens discovered me, they'd wonder why a popular recording artist chose my brain to store his music.

The Poopisode

It's pushed out of the pipes and ready for public. We pushed it out: the Poopisode.

Google this!

It's been clear to me for several months that Google now runs Blogger. Typically, I force from my mind any tech industry news I catch on NPR (we don't inflict insider information about our jobs on the entire country); however, it's become clear Googles running the show around here. I notice that I now have to sign into my gmail account before blogging and that blogger spell check works which in my mind points to Google. Initially I accepted this. Like an Italian in the early 1930s, I said, well at least the trains are running on time, fuck it.

But could Google be overrated? Yes, they have integrated my email with my blog I suppose, but let's look at some of their "target advertising". In the right margin of my email I notice a site that intends to teach me how to dance salsa. Over the last 7 or 8 years my feelings about salsa have grown from vague interest, to frustration and disappointment around my attempts at the most basic moves, to a full grown, mature hatred. I literally just encouraged my fiance to go salsa dancing with our downstairs neighbor who openly hits on her just to allow some outlet for her salsa instinct that doesn't involve me. But fair enough that Google doesn't know that. I'm probably in the demographic of the salsa student so I'll let it pass.

On to the next bit of advertising: a site that promises to teach me the secrets of training Karelian bear hunting dogs. I own neither a dog nor have much use for bear hunting partners of any species. Enough said on that one...

Thus I am brought to my favorite bit of advertising, targeted with the precision of a laser guided stealth missile fired by a crazed and drunken Central Asian dictator who thinks he is playing Mario Cart: it's the professional website of a one, Dr. Edmund Kwan. Dr. Kwan offers Thermage, the only none invasive plastic surgery technology that promises to preserve my youthful appearance and my Asian heritage. I of course am white, but maybe I'll give Dr. Kwan a shot. Dr. Kwan's approach is subtle and sensitive. Dr. Kwan knows "preserving ethnicity is the biggest concern of Asians having plastic surgery". Does that mean Asians can age into white people? Will I age into hottie Brazilian chick? Who knows? In a section of the website called ethnic identity, aka classic Kwan, Kwan writes that Asian cosmetic surgery was often done in beauty parlors, then he sights some financial statistics about Asian American buying power (for no particular reason), then he deftly and delicately notes that some Asian Americans want to look more white and some don't thus appealing to the entire spectrum of what he views as his potential clientele. He then emphasizes the subtlety of his work again. I had just wanted to send an email about meeting up for beers later, but now that Goolge has presented me with this, I'm hooked.

Before I go for the full tummy tuck, I better shift the homebase of Blue Fish Canoe to Kyle's job. Stay tunned for the new url.

A quick review

Things that are terrible: movies about relationships. Oooo, we're soo sophisticated. And what's going on with this guy? And what's going on with his hair?

Things that are great: a Worcester boy and Jesse Berkett little league alum, Andy Ross, winning a grammy.

She-male fish

We have some more bad news for Baltimore this morning. It turns out pollutants leaking into the Chesapeake are making she-male fish according to Science the blog. One of these sex changing chemicals is Thalate, which Science the blog defines as "new car smell". Of course this is only bad news for more conservative Chesapeake dwellers, while some fish are into the she-male scene. We at Bluefish Canoe support their alternative life choice.

Island broken for main

A professor I have has the unfortunate luck to have lost much of his hair in the usual fashion of male pattern baldness, except he's kept his bangs. It's an island of hair broken off from the mainland like Florida after the icecaps melt. I can't think of a less dignified way for the hair to go. I can also see how it might be difficult to shave any hair once one starts to lose hair. You don't want to give the wrong impression to hair you want to keep. It's a tough situation.

Got to go..

I was about to write a blog today that makes novel, witty and insightful observations about our world (or maybe even a satirical look at a modern life so bleak (I hadn't decided)) but I'm called to mentor the youth of this nation